Anyone who knows me well, knows that the week of our book club meeting I lay pretty low. I am doing something I should have done all month, and that is read the book. This month the book was Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake by Anna Quindlen, which is about her life and thoughts about growing older. Our facilitator asked us to share our thoughts, so this is what I’ve been doing, and this will be my contribution today.
The exercise to share made me really think about my life..backwards and forwards. I decided to pin point one thing that shaped my life..what made me who I am..effected my happiness, my attitudes and my ability to face and overcome difficult situations. It had to be the mentors I was so fortunate to have. I attribute my happiness now to several mentors, that seemed to have entered my life at the right time. One of my favorites was Daisy, who is having a profound influence on my life now. I met Daisy 8 years ago. She was 92 and her daughter was bringing her to The Villages to live with her, as she felt she should not be alone in New Jersey. She had tried for several years to convince her to come to Florida, but only after a very icy winter did Daisy give up her home, and and her drivers license, and finally succumbed to the inevitable. She agreed to come, although she did so kicking and screaming all the way down Rt.#95. I should give you a little background on Daisy. She was of Dutch descent. She was raised, and also raised her family in the Dutch Reform religion. She lived her whole live in Prospect Park, New Jersey, which was a town that was founded on the religion, which meant no cars on Sunday in the town, and hanging clothes out on Sunday was a no, no. Just a few things I knew about the town as one who grew up nearby. I guess the first hint that Daisy was ahead of her times was when her only daughter married a Catholic. When my friend said her 92 year old mother was going to join our Thursday night dinners, which is a group of 16 that go out every Thursday night, I was a little skeptical to say the least, that is until I met Daisy. She was one of the most interesting persons I have ever met. She, at the age of 92, still read the New York Times, front to back every day. She was more contemporary than I was, she was an avid reader and her opinions always seemed to be right on. I formed a great bond with her, and as our Birthdays were a day a part, we always had a Birthday Bash..Daisy and I. I always told her when I grow up I want to be just like you. She was my new best idol. I especially loved her stories about her early years. She told me once when she was about 10 years old, she was visiting a friends’ house and they had store bought bread that was sliced. She thought this was the greatest thing, however when she ran home raving about the bread that was sliced, her mother said…”How lazy does some one get.” She had many stories of growing up in the early 1900’s. Oh…Daisy loved to have a Manhattan with her dinner, and I can’t tell you how many times we would say to a waitress..yes she said a Manhattan. She would take a sip, wink to indicate her approval, hold her head high and drink it with dignity. If there ever was a grande dame, it was Daisy. Oh, she loved to play Poker too, and she did every Sunday. As she would go out the door, she would always say, if anyone calls I’m at Bible Study. When Daisy died at 97, after just a few days in the hospital, she left all who knew her, a wonderful legacy. She was our living proof that we could grow old and still have fun, and maybe do things we never imagined doing, just as Daisy did…drink Manhattans and play poker. How many people in Prospect Park NJ did that? The biggest gift Daisy gave us was she took the fear out of growing old. She was a wonderful mentor to all who knew her, I miss her dearly and she holds a very special place in my heart, as do all my mentors.